Transitioning From Living Alone to Moving Back Home: Post-Grad Life

For over 3 and a half years I was living in apartments and dorms. This may seem like a short period of time, but trust me, it felt like a lifetime. College seemed like an entire decade of my life. Looking back at it now, it ultimately was not that long at all and I was even lucky enough to graduate early. Where did this feeling of longevity come from? This period of time taught me how to be independent, but now that this independence is so instilled in my brain, how hard is it going to be to transition into moving back home?

In high school and years prior, I had the ease of my mom cooking dinner, doing laundry, and taking care of all of the little details that come with daily living. I totally realize now how lucky I was. When I moved into my dorm, I was quickly faced with the reality of dining hall food, shared laundry, and a roommate. These things were not as bad as they seemed at the moment, I was clearly just dramatic. Yes, I’m cringing. Now don’t get me wrong, I adapted pretty quickly, but it was definitely an entire learning experience. Although there were some not-so-great parts of living in a dorm, it taught me a lot about myself, how different people are from one another, and how to handle tough living situations. I look back now and realize how fortunate I was to experience these things for myself.

The Initial Taste of Freedom

The nice part about living alone was the freedom that came with it. This newfound luxury of being able to go wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted, was something I never completely experienced before. I officially felt like an adult. It was great. However, living in a big city, I started to understand why my parents were worried about me, even in my suburban hometown. Freedom came with distinguishing what was a good idea and what was a bad idea. Maybe taking public transportation at 3 in the morning wasn’t the best?

All of high school and even in our younger junior high/middle school days, we long for a taste of freedom from our parents. It feels good to “have them off our backs” and to do whatever we want. Growing up you realize that the only reason they cared where we were or what we were doing was because they cared.

My Apartment Years

I loved my college apartment. I was lucky enough to live with one of my best friends and snag a unit in a brand new building right across campus. Eating in the dining hall was no longer an option, so of course, I was excited to go grocery shopping. I had to break up with the beloved dorm twin bed and get my own furniture. At last… I had my own bedroom and bathroom. That meant having the freedom of decorating however I wanted and I finally felt like the space was mine. After a few weeks of living in an apartment versus a dorm, I instantly starting realizing how different the two were. Saying you live in an apartment holds more value than just a dorm. With an apartment comes way more responsibility. Security deposits, having people over, safety, decorating… It’s all different. A whole new level of independence.

Now, can we take a second to recognize the amount of stuff an apartment needs? I never realized the number of cleaning products, kitchen supplies, and overall junk I needed to get. The definition of cleaning was no longer just vacuuming. It meant wiping counters, deep cleaning the bathroom, dusting and so many other things because the space was mine and no one else was going to clean it for me. This is when my obsessive clean-freak mindset came through. I was no longer able to function without everything being sparkly clean. Because it was not a shared space, I wanted everything to be perfect, all the time. It’s a good trait to have, but not one I recognized before having my own place.

Where We’re At Now

This is a new stage of life. Since I graduated from college, I no longer needed to have an apartment near campus. I was weighing my options on what the best course of action would be after graduating and it seemed pretty simple. I’ve come to terms with the fact that saving money by not paying rent would be best. I mean duh, it only makes sense to save thousands of dollars on rent while searching for big girl jobs. Of course, I would love to live in a beautiful apartment in Chicago, but it’s important to be realistic. There’s a time for everything. I’m sure by the end of the year, I’ll be living in the city again but for right now, I’m okay with moving back home.

When thinking about moving back home, I honestly was a little bummed. I liked having my own space- that was the main thing. The more I thought about it, the more apparent it became; nothing was being taken away from me, I was gaining more than I thought I was losing. As an adult, it’s different living at home.

So, What’s My Point?

All I’m saying is to ignore the stigma around moving out of your parent’s house as soon as you graduate. There is so much social pressure towards having life go a certain way. People these days don’t take things day-by-day, but rather follow society’s standards. It’s okay if it takes a while to get a job, and it’s okay if finding a place isn’t a priority. I was the type of person who had a plan for my life after graduation, but then I realized it’s so much better to just let things play out the way they’re supposed to. Although there are some downfalls to living at home as an adult, it’s easy to make the best of it. When looking at the bigger picture, the pros outweigh the cons by a long shot.